'Close to 4.30 I wake up, I’m convinced that there is a shooting pain running through my left arm and that my chest is tightening. I massage my arm and think of all the shitty food I’ve eaten this week. I think of all the cigarettes I’ve smoked recently after giving up for eight months, and how much I’ve drunk recently. The only thing I’ve done to prevent a heart attack is running. I run trying to get away from something, I don’t entirely know what this something is, maybe it’s the threat of having a heart attack if I don’t keep running?

I’m worried one day my heart will stop beating from all the shit I’ve been eating'